In this column we recently wrote about literary references to Billiards. It was but a spontaneous effort, and the only serious reference which came readily to mind was that in" The Mikado." Since then we have looked the matter up, and find that many of the old writers had something to say on the subject.
As long ago as 1591 Spenser, the author of "The Faerie Queene" was responsible for the following lines: "With all the thriftless games that may be found, With dice, with cards, with billiards."
From this quotation it will be seen that even in those early days the game was considered one of the vices rather than an accomplishment to be encouraged. Fortunately, as we said last month, the game has lived down the bad reputation, and is now looked upon as a healthy exercise, and skill in the game is no longer a thing of shame, but something of which to be proud.
The old billiard-room joke about a "mis-spent youth" is obsolete, and anyone perpetrating it in the twentieth century deserves to be consigned to a Salvation Army Barracks for the rest of his life.
It is but another case of the survival of the fittest. The game having no inherent wickedness has won through, and is now recognised as a pastime of kings.
Quotations of similar tenour to the one given above are more or less numerous in the late 16th and early 17th centuries, and we read in 1873 "Nothing is known about billiards prior to the middle of the 16th century."
Thus the quotation we give must be one of the very earliest.
In 1637 Dr. Johnson's famous biographs said "Smooth as is the billiard ball," whilst in 1606 in "Antony and Cleopatra," II., v. 3, Shakespeare says "Let it alone—let's to billiards."
This latter quotation should be famous as one of Shakespeare's anachronisms—but there is every excuse for him, as the game was comparatively new and undoubtedly fashionable at that time.
Sheridan writes in "The Rivals": "Seven waiters and thirteen billiard markers," from which it is evident that by this date a new and honourable profession had arisen.
Later Cowper in the "Task" mentions "a billiard mast," by which he means a billiard cue. One can hardly imagine Cowper indulging in such a robust pastime as billiards, and consequently calling a cue a mast can be overlooked in his case. No other contemporary quotations show that billiard mast was a general expression, and it was probably as near the poor hymn writer could get, but he may plead "poet's license." This was in 1785.
Thirty-two years later Coleridge wrote "When the billiard stick strikes the first or white ball," which would indicate that some slight change has been made in the game since that time.
Later references to the game than the latter are legion, but one dated 1865 is of interest as a kind of "human document ": "He meant to climb to all that was pure and heroic by billiard sharping." Evidently a mistaken young gentleman.
Thackeray also has his reference as follows: "Leading to the billiard room and the library."
In 1677 Evelyn, of "Diary" fame, says: "In the middle is a billiard table," and in 1711 Steele: "Bowling greens, billiard tables, and such like places."
Thus billiards has its place in our literature, and having; established it we are at peace.
The few references given have been culled from one or two well-known reference dictionaries, and even this small amount of research has brought us into touch with a number of absorbing subjects which we hope to inflict on "Billiard Times" readers. We may, if the subject is of interest to them, probe still further into our ancient literature to find other famous writers who have had things complimentary and otherwise to say of our game. Any assistance readers can give, or any suggestions as to topics for discussion on this page will be welcomed. All envelopes should be marked "Law and Learning."
Billiard jokes are either very stale or very bad. There are a few which one has heard many, many times, served up with different trimmings maybe, but the same old joke at the finish, a joke that will never raise a laugh again in a billiard room.
We have searched far and wide, and during the last five years not a single new joke on billiards has come to our knowledge. If any readers have been more fortunate, please communicate. This is not a competition, but whilst we are offering no prizes for new jokes sent in, we are considering a scheme of penalties to inflict on the senders of chestnuts.
The old discussion which has amused many and infuriated more as to the distinction between "Science and Art" has a decided application to Billiards. To which of the two does the royal game belong? Is it an art or aħ science? We know we are once again opening a very vexed question, but we have our own opinion, and any other has but small chance of getting past the Sub-Editor. Undoubtedly the theory of the game can be classed amongst the sciences. The movements of the balls, the action of the cloth, cushions, angles, the effect of side, strength and aim are determined by certain well-defined laws of certain branches of science. The correct and skilled application of these laws in the practice of Billiards is undoubtedly "art."
Stevenson is an artist, and no one would dream of calling him a scientist in consideration of his knowledge of billiards and his powers with the cue.
The inventive genius has turned his attention to our game in no small measure. A glance at the Patent Office records show frequent additions to the number of devices for the better equipment of the table and its accessories.
Cushions, pockets, beds, balls, cues, scoring boards, chalk holders, none have escaped but no great mind has invented a royal road to a break of even moderate proportions.
John Roberts has perhaps come nearest in his series of articles entitled"How to make a hundred break" but we have found a great many breaks even when adopting his suggestions most carefully and thoroughly.
On looking through a partial list of these inventions we come across one described as "for improvements relating to billiard markers." Now we know a number of markers who could be very considerably improved, but the inventor does not tell us who is going to "bell the cat" or how it is going to be done.
The markers we have mentioned might possibly be conscious of some improvements required in the person desiring to improve them, and, what is worse, they might set about doing them. It would be well for this inventor to devise a plan for effecting the improvements whilst the marker slept.