The Indian billiard-marker differs in nearly every respect from the Western variety. Although Elaihi Bux plays an equally good game, he has none of the alertness of the white man; he does not always keep the table clean—a failing which not infrequently provokes the anger of hotheaded subalterns and civilians new to the country, and an extraordinary partiality for sleeping at odd moments has a particularly bad effect upon his intelligence. This probably accounts for the eccentric manner in which he sometimes scores:—If immediately before the "station" crack has made a break of nine the score stood at forty all, he sleepily drawls out (in the high-pitched voice peculiar to the black man) "forty-one, forty." When corrected by the indignant player, the fellow cannot be made to understand that he is to blame; he endures (with the air of a martyr) the taunts of the "sahib" and inwardly prays for another mutiny!
The native marker begins young. Indeed, Elaihi Bux learns to chalk a cue and to brush the table soon after he can walk; consequently, at the age of sixteen he is a fully qualified marker—that is to say, fully-qualified in the native sense. His father then sits on doorsteps and pulls as many wires as possible, until the youth is provided with employment. If the sire is a billiard-marker, he expects his off-spring, as a matter of course, to succeed to his billet.
In this connection, it should be noted that the calling is handed down from father to son, and that in some families each son has been a billiard-marker ever since billiards was first introduced into India.
When the fully-fledged marker hears of a vacancy in a club, mess, or hotel, he applies (in writing) for the post.
Being, however, unable to write English, he avails himself of the services of an educated native, who, for the equivalent of a few pence, condescends to help any applicant having need of his services. With the aid of a dictionary and a Shakespeare, a letter of the following unpunctuated description is composed:—
Honourable Sir,
I am a poor fellow but worthy who is the son of Ram Dass for over thirty years club billiard-marker. So will your Honour kindly appoint me to vacancy caused by the death of Moti who is dead of a cholera complaint. I am a chip old blocks and can score well, so kindly appoint.
I am a honest sober one and a harder worker so please do the needful and for this I will ever pray as in duty bound for your Honour's past and future progeny and speedy promotion to exalted sphere as per your honour's wish.
Your dutiful applicant.
Should the club secretary take no notice of this effusion, he will probably be favoured in about three days' time with a reminder, which is couched in equally odd language.
Thus:—
Honourable Sir,
I venture to crawl into your honour's fount of human kindness I solicit a reply to my late favour of three days' date. I am first class billiard marker son of billiard marker father I will be the hard worker and I speak some English Counting so I ask the early reply and hearing to my prayer at your honour's convenience.
Your dutiful and most well wishing Applicant.
These two letters it may be noted were actually written by an Indian billiard-marker last April.
Should the powers-that-be still remain deaf to the aspirant's entreaties, he either leaves for another" station," where a similar position is vacant, or, as an unpalatable alternative, puts up with a billet in a cheap hotel. If the happy man is so fortunate as to be appointed to a good club, he makes a special point of collecting as many" chits " (testimonials) as possible. Some of these are couched in a highly laudatory strain, especially if the sagacious marker has deftly flattered the writers, but others are concocted by merry subalterns who take advantage of the black man's ignorance of English. The subjoined examples speak for themselves:—
On the West Coast of India the billiard-markers are, as a rule, Goanees; but since they speak Hindustani far better than English—and are even blacker than the "up-country" man—they rank as natives. Unfortunately, these people do not wear the picturesque turban and flowing snow-white "chupkun" and "dhoti" of the North of India marker; they prefer to show off their scrimpy bodies and scraggy legs in ill-cut tweed (or black) trousers and white drill "mess" jackets, an antiquated "Shakespeare" collar, a make-up black bow-tie, and an extremely odd-looking waistcoat completing the costume. Although they all rejoice in distinguished Portuguese names, such as Pereira, Gonzales, de Cruz, and de Sousa, they are no more civilised than are the native billiard-markers. Indeed, like all half-castes, their inferiority to the genuine coloured man is very marked. But they pride themselves upon their fancied superiority.
Native markers are not highly paid. Even in a large and wealthy club, fifteen rupees (£1) a month is considered a generous salary, while in small clubs and hotels from twelve to fifteen shillings is as much as the most skilled marker can expect. If, however, the wages are low, the cost of living is not excessive. A small room in the "bazaar" costs about two rupees (2s. 8d.) a month, and the tenants food and clothing purchaser are conducted on an equally economic scale. A handful of boiled rice morning and evening, with a plate of vegetable curry at midday, is as much as he requires to keep him alive. These luxuries work out at about two annas (two-pence) a day; but if he has been fortunate in the matter of "buksheesh," he does not stint himself in "meetai"(a native sweetmeat made of rancid butter and the coarsest sugar), to which he is partial.
Nor are his clothes expensive: the costume of the country can be bought in the "bazaar" for from three to four rupees (4s. to 5s. 4d.), and the suit affected by the Goanese marker, though costing three times the price, lasts twice as long. If he is married, his wife earns the cost of her keep by performing domestic and mental duties, and the number of children is in strict proportion to the father's wages. The Goanese marker, on the other hand, is sometimes cursed with the instinct of a patriarch, and, by the time he has to give up work, is surrounded by hordes of parti-coloured sons and daughters.
The black billiard marker's amusements are as simple and inexpensive as they are limited.
He takes no interest in theatres; neither European nor native music appeals to him; he has no desire to risk his savings at a race-meeting, nor to drink; the questionable joys of the excursion train are unknown to him; and he does not care for sight-seeing. Elaihi Bux's only pleasure in life consists in sleeping and chattering to his neighbours.
The easily-pleased person may often be seen of an evening in the "bazaar" in the company of servants from the different "bungalows," to whom he babbles about the "station" players, and other matters. "Salaam! O Khansamah-ji, I hear your sahib has entered for the tournament... Yes, O marker, he thinks he will win easily.... But the new sahib who has just arrived from England plays so well that he is certain to win.... Ram Din is in jail for stealing.... My sahib says that sahibs in India play better than sahibs in England.... 'Tis shameful that the price of tobacco is increased.... The Captain sahib yesterday made a break of thirty.... No, I will not get my new turban from the shop of Ali Mahomet; he charges far too much. I shall ask the mem-sahib to give me one. She is very kind, and so stupid that she will believe me when I tell her my sick wife takes all my salary.... If the General sahib comes, he will play billiards at the club.... If you score so that he wins, you will surely get some buksheesh from him, O Moti Ram!... I should have been given buksheesh by Inyat Ali when I paid my mem-sahib's bills last month. I shall now put some sand in the tea, so that she will take her custom to the Parsee shop where I always get four annas in the rupee....
And the Calcutta shop from which the secretary got the new billiard balls has not remembered me; I do not think those balls will give satisfaction to the members!... "