To play the game of Billiards you've got to learn a lot,
It isn't simply "cannons," "loser," or a "pot";
It will take you all your time to learn to make a decent
"screw,"
And when you think you know a bit, just try a "follow
through."
But when you come to using "side," it's really almost
worse,
It's years before you get to know the "running" from
"reverse";
And though you think you've judged it right, it's wholly
on the cards
That your side has spoilt your aim, and so you miss your
shot by yards!
In considering the cushions, your head will fairly swell—
When you wonder—"Is it fine with just a trifle side as
well,
Suppose I hit it nearly full, and if so will it "kiss"?
And shall I play with "drag" on that or drop down on to
this?
You will learn to know the cannon when it always will
be found
That whatever spot you play for, the ball will travel
round!
You try to do a "forcing shot" and nearly smash the
pocket,
Or put on too much "screw" and make it swerve like
any rocket.
You must peg at "losing hazards" for several hours a
day,
And cram up dusty Billiard books when you're too dog tired
to play;
And when you've read and practised till your mind becomes
a blur,
You may get briefly mentioned as a "useful amateur."
M. H. R.